| Location | Banbury, Oxfordshire |
| Age | 64 years |
| Date of Birth | 6/1942 |
| Date of Death | 2/2007 |
| Visitors | 925 since 17/08/2007 |
| Creator |
I cannot say enough about my Dad. He was the most special Dad any girl could ask for. I miss him so much.....
This is a picture of my Mum & Dad taken in the late 1960's. I love this picture so much and can almost hear him now telling me how he had got home from work and just decided to take the chance and use the last picture on the film and take a picture of themselves. I wasn't even born at the time - I came last after three boys.
So basically he worked hard all of his life, raised four children and then he fought a battle with cancer for 14 months before it took him away from us. He was taken at the age of 64 years and he never even got to retire. As a man he never had a bad word to say about anyone as a Dad he was the best and I know my three brothers would agree with that. He was also a Grandad and always had time for all of his grandchildren. He was a loving and decent man who did not deserve to have to go through all the pain and fear that cancer brings. I wrote a letter to my Dad that I read at his funeral, I hope he could hear me - I think it says it all.....
Dear Dad,
I don’t see your grey skin or your dark sunken eyes. I see in your eyes my Dad. I see your broad and strong shoulders that carried me when I was small. I see your twinkling eyes and a deep broad grin spreading across your face. I can hear your infectious laughing now. I look at your hands and take in the rough skin of a working man whose hands have made and fixed and created beautiful things. The hands of a man who has held in his arm so tenderly my new born children and then down on the floor hands that played cars and built lego houses and held my children’s hands. I can’t hear your quiet tired voice Dad asking for help because all I can hear now is your deep strong voice talking to me and telling me a tale of where you have been and what you have seen. I don’t see the shaking of your hands any longer all I see is your firm steady grip on the steering wheel as you drive along country lanes, Mum is sitting next to you and all us kids are in the back. You are not in a bed at the Hospice Dad you are in your truck on a night run and music is playing on the radio and you are singing along at the top of your voice. I see you walking down the path and jumping in Georges van and then high up on a roof with your son working side by side with your flask of tea never far away. I see a strong man before me who even in your last days taught us a lesson. You have taught me, you have taught us all, about dignity and strength. A lesson on braveness and courage when facing your greatest nemesis. You didn’t loose the fight Dad you won it – you have walked away and now you are as you were before this nightmare began.
You created a family that love you so much and have grown strong because of you. You created a family that pulled together and strived to help you as much as we could. We all helped each other to do what we could and we are still doing that now.
I wanted to keep you for longer Dad and I wanted you to see my children grow but today I know the truth. You will see my children grow Dad and you will be with us forever because a spirit and a heart as big as yours could never just die. Through your children and through our children you will live forever and your strength and huge heart will live on. Today we have not come to say goodbye to you Dad, this is not the end. You have gone somewhere that is free of pain and illness and you are happy and smiling again now. You will watch over your family and all those you love and I know that someday we will see each other again.
See you later Dad.
I Love you. X
Although I (his daughter) have created this website he also left behind a wife, three sons, two daughter-in-laws, one son-in-law and eight grandchildren. We all adored him and he has left a gap in all of our lives - he had so much time for us all and we will forever miss him.
Hi Philly
Just thought I would stop by and check you're not misbehaving and make sure you're wearing your paper hat!
Life has had its twists and turns in this last year. Its not been the best due to my Dad passing away in February. There's been this void that was reminiscent of when you left us early. I have been managing to keep working but its been a challenge to stay working! The HGV driving is becoming more easier and is starting to be like second nature but the snow these last couple of weeks has been making things interesting. Lots of tractor rescues etc. I am sure you have been there a few times!
Its odd that you never knew about me driving. Life is moving so quickly its hard to believe. Sharon is now brave enough to put pictures of you on our walls so there's never a chance that we would forget you! She can now talk about you without bursting into fits of tears so there is progress...All I know is that she is very proud of you, talks about you alot and I am sure a tear falls in her private moments...
This is life though I suppose. Sometimes I hate it. I have so much time to think when I am driving. Probably the same as you did. Long straight roads, headlights finding the way in the wake of dawn and then your mind wanders whilst listening to the radio. Too much time to think sometimes so I have to turn the radio off!
My mum is alone now and it makes me feel very sad to know that. She tells me she is fine but I know she is protecting me - she knows that I am sensitive and she is been a loving protective mother as she has always been. All i can do is talk to her on the phone and hold my tears and tell her its will be ok. She once told me there is nothing left for her now. She has carried out her parental duties and raised 3 sons successfully. I tell her she still has 3 sons to mother. The reality is she is so much stronger than me Philly.
Anyway I am looking after Sharon the best I can and you have 2 grand children that are growing up fast. You would be very proud of them. Today is Christmas Day and we are all thinking about you and missing you.
Look after my Dad Philly and show him the way as you have more experience. Raise a glass for us today and we will do the same for you both.
God Bless you both and rest easy...
Your No 1 Son-In-Law, John xxx
Christmas 2010
Here I am again Dad. You know how it is...the tree is up & I am all ready for Christmas and you are on my mind. Not been the best of years - we lost Jim (John's Dad) this year so it's been a tough one for John and his Mum. Makes you wonder what the point is sometimes when you have to keep loosing those you love so much.
Don't know what you would make of all this snow we keep getting - it reminds me of the winter of 1981...do you remember that morning when the snow had drifted half way up the front door? You called me downstairs to show me! It was amazing to see and what did you do? Made a sledge! God we had fun that day! That is something I cherish so much is the fact that you made things so much fun and made me look at things with different eyes. You had a real love of nature and things of beauty that were there in front of us - you just had to stop and look at them and enjoy! Thank you for being the best Dad that has ever walked this Earth. I miss you so much and it breaks my heart that you cannot be here to see my two lovely children. I know you adored them and shared some really special times with them and for that I count my blessings. We will raise a glass Dad on Christmas day (as we always do) and wish that wherever you are that you can see your adoring family and know that you will forever be in our minds and hearts. Christmas morning always makes me count my blessings and just as every Christmas morning that has come since you have gone I will whisper Happy Christmas to you Dad. Love you so much Dad, always have & always will XXX
Christmas 2009
Another Christmas is just around the corner - this time of year makes me think about you so much....I was thinking tonight about our trips to Oaks Lane to Nan and Grandads, we always went around Christmas time and I so loved it! They spoiled me and I adored them, but you know that! We had a few sprinkles of snow today and that reminded me of a winter when I must have been about 6 or 7 and you opened the front door to show me the snow that had drifted up the side of the house - I was amazed and you laughed at my excitement. You was soon in the shed making a sledge for us kids! You could make almost anything with a piece of wood and a few nails :) Never a day goes by without you somewhere in my thoughts, there is always something to remind me of you. At the moment we are just counting our blessings - it has been a rough year but we have survived. Ryan is recovering so well now and I am sure that you have been watching out for him over the last few weeks. We had some real dark days and I know he struggled to get through but to look at him now you would never know! I know you would have been so proud of him for being so brave and going through with the op - not an easy thing to go through but he done it. Katie would make you smile and laugh so much and she talks about you more than ever now. She says that you are in a bubble in her head and she often sheds a little tear for you but it makes me so happy that she knew you Dad and that she can remember you before you were ill. John is still 'trucking' and god I bet you are proud of him! Look out for him though Dad, I do worry about him out on the roads at night but like to think that you are around keeping an eye on him and keeping him awake in the small hours. I am still loving my work Dad and busy getting things ready for Christmas. I see so many people who have lost loved ones and I know it helps me to know how it feels. I really wish I didn't know.
So the tree is up and the shopping is done and Katie is getting more excited by the day. We will talk about you and raise a glass and probably shed a few tears but we will laugh too and smile at the many memories we have safely tucked away in our hearts. I cherish those memories so much and even though it hurts to recall moments and events they make me smile too.
Thinking about you, my Dad, at Christmas time and all the year through. Love you, always xxx
Days, weeks, months.......
Dad, How the time slips by and how things change. Still I cannot believe that you are not with us any more. I think about you so much and have so many fantastic memories and I still see you so clearly in my mind... I hope I always will. We need some strength Dad to get us through the next few weeks and months. Ryan has got a lot to face and I know that you'll be with us all and get us through this. We all carry you in our hearts and in our memories you are so alive, you always will be. Love you Dad x
Cannot believe.....
Dear Dad, I just cannot believe that 2 years have passed since that morning when you slipped away....I have been a bit crabby today 'cos this day just takes me back to that nightmare. Wish so much you were still here and wish so much that you had never had to go through what you did. Yeah, yeah Dad I know what you would say...that's life and you just got to get on with it.. but sometimes it hard :) I am getting on with it Dad... honest! Missing you and loving you just the same though and still hating the bloody gap that you have left - always will. Sending you love n hugs Dad XXXX
Christmas time
The tree is up, the shopping is done and all the normal Christmas rushing and planning is well under way...and all through it there is this great big gap.
Sorting through the Christmas deco's last weekend and there are the Christmas cards from you from years gone by - I know they are there and that is where they will stay. I need them to stay there just so I can look at your writting and read the words again - it hurts but it makes me feel happy too because those cards were written a long time before we ever knew what was going to happen to you. Those were the days when we all knew what gifts you had wrapped by the amount of sticky tape on them - it took forever to open a present that you had wrapped! We will raise a glass or two to you Dad and remember those happy days. I can see you so clearly after Chrsitmas dinner, asleep with your party hat still on your head... Anyway, what I really wanted to say Dad is that you are in our thoughts this Christmas and as you know, you always will be. Life throws us all the ups and downs and I know that you are there looking out for us and that you always will be. The gap you left behind will always be painful but the love you gave to me and John and your grand children will last a lifetime. Thank you Dad for everything you gave to us and I will never forget how blessed I was to have got you for my Dad, you really were one in a million XXX With love from your Daughter XXX
Bonfire Night....again
Dear Dad,
Funny how special dates always make me think of you...it's the memories that come with them that remind me of so many good times shared with you. So now Ryan's Birthday is just a few days away and this weekend we will celebrate with the usual fireworks and fun. The house will be overtaken by teenagers this year - same dates just the guests getting older! You were always around Dad for Ryans birthdays wasn't you? Helping to build the bonfire and always 'helping' to tuck into the food and wine! I remember three years ago Dad and you and Mum here to celebrate with us - that was the last time - before you got ill. We did have fun though and it's funny how we remember little snippets, like photographs in our minds. I can see you now Dad outside our house watching the fireworks - your face lit up by the lights. Your hands were deep in your pockets - it was cold that year. You were bracing yourself against the cold night air and you looked over to me and Katie and just smiled... The cancer was there but we didn't yet know it. But I have years of great memories Dad that always make me smile. The last party at Heyford is a golden one! Ryan had made a rule that everyone had to be in fancy dress that year and I still laugh now to think of you arriving on our doorstep dressed as Dracula complete with a long flowing cape...LOL. You were always around Dad and always ready to get the fun started! That's why we all love you so much Dad because you were always around, always there... Look in on us on Saturday night Dad and I'll keep an eye out for you - reckon you'll be warming yourself by the bonfire waiting for me to put the kettle on. I'd give anything Dad to see you there and to be able to slip my arm through yours and just stand there, with my Dad. Love you XXX
Birthday Thoughts
Thought about you a lot today Dad. You would have been 66 today so sending you birthday love and hugs. Miss you so much - we all do. Wish you were here to share our highs and lows but know you are watching over us and that you always will.
Love you Dad.
Sharon XXX
Things change...
I know John has lit a candle for you tonight and I know that you will be watching out for him tomorrow - whatever happens I know you will be proud of him for going for his test - I can hear you now and I also know that you would have been able to have given him so much good advice. Oh dear the tears are welling up now... sorry Dad. It's so hard to accept that we are all moving on and living our lives yet you are no longer with us to share in our good and bad times. The normal day to day stuff that goes on and you loved to hear about it all didn't you. So what can I tell you? I think you already know it all! But anyway... Ryan is doing well in his new job - he loves the people and the work and is making his way now and is still so laid back - we all know where he got that from! Katie is growing up so fast and I know she would have loved telling you about the fun we have had this week - she has got her ears pierced and is so proud of herself for being so brave and cannot wait to show them to her friends at school! I have had a bit of time of work and managed to do my back in decorating the kitchen - am on the mend now though and am back at work tomorrow. Loving my job Dad but miss not being able to tell you about it. That's the problem - I just miss not being able to talk to you, it hurts so much and I don't think I will ever stop missing you and being able to talk to you. So life goes on and the children grow and it hurts Dad - not being able to share it with you.
Goodnight Dad XXX
Valentines Day
Valentines Day will forever mark your final journey. I can still see the 'boys' carrying you into the chapel - it is etched in my mind forever. It was so right Dad that they done that for you but so wrong that you were gone. I know you would have been so proud of us all that day. You always were. That day was full of tears but laughter too - I know you would have loved all of the trips down memory lane. We done you proud Dad but you knew we would didn't you? We would have done anything for you just like you would have done for us. Always missing you Dad. XXX
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